By Vaibhavi

My Family Added Up To Insecurities I Already Had

Being a girl from a joint family, it has always been difficult for me to accept my body as it is because of the constant criticism I face due to my appearance.

The birthmark on my nose has always been the main concern for me, as I was told it ruined my beauty and was constantly asked to hide it. I gradually felt ashamed of my birthmark and tried to cover it up. This added to the insecurities I already had about myself.

After I started menstruating, I gained tremendous weight. I felt even more embarrassed and ashamed as I was criticized in public places by my family. I started to hate my body, and I was constantly being compared to my cousins about my looks. I was always told how being fat made me appear more vulnerable than I already was.

I am a grown girl now. I have accepted myself as I am; I love myself with all the body fat. The birthmark on my nose has started to disappear, but still, there is that little voice in my head that tells me that I am fat and that my body is not beautiful. I try to cover myself up as much as I can. I avoid wearing dresses that expose my body. Even though I have accepted my body, I still face difficulties believing that I am beautiful and worthy. I continue to struggle with feeling inadequate in my own skin and in my own body.

Although things have changed this day, my family has somewhere accepted that there are no frames in which everybody fits and there should be acceptance of one's own body. I am slowly growing to love my body and everything it stands for, even if it takes me a while to get there.

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#Insecurity #EmotionAccounting #SelfHealing #SelfCare #BDD #SelfAcceptance #GenerationalTrauma #Family #SelfRealization #Strength